May Madness

It's been about 20 days since my last update, and though nothing overtly exciting has happened, there still has been some progress in my life. (well duh).

For those wondering about mom, she is doing ok. Right ow she is actually in Calgary, AB looking into alternative treatment. We will make sure to always check with her doctors before starting anything, BUT it is promising, not only in her attitude, but the foundation she is checking out seems to have had some success.

I've been doing tons of gardening. I even had my first strawberry from the garden last week, it was delicious! Broccoli and all is growing, with the spring rain we've been having I was worried my little seedlings would be drowned, but they loved it and are growing like crazy now! Well, except for my carrots, those just aren't taking.

Andrew's been busy making me planters in between his regular job and helping out at the lake on the weekend. Ugh, he's only done 2 weekends and I'm already done with. I could be more patient, but knowing that he's leaving in July for training gives me more incentive to 1. put him to work and 2. spend the sunny times with him.

Andrew and I also had our one year anniversary on the 21st. It's hard to believe we've passed one year of marriage, but we have. So much has happened in that time and I'm still so thankful to have him in my life. With all that has gone on and Andrew has truly become my rock, amidst all this turmoil!

I leave you with some pictures of my month:

My radishes and tomatoes are coming along nicely!

Up top: cucumbers and spinach
Down below: green onion, some other lettucy stuff mom wanted, cauliflower, broccoli, and lettuce.

First strawberry!

The seedlings that are waiting for their home. Lot of beans, some tomatoes hiding, and zuchini.



My Laine, who finally got over his fear of outside and spent the afternoon laying in the shade beside me while I suntanned!



Cancer's continuation

One of the hardest things I have ever had to hear, was my mom telling me that she had cancer. After treatment and surgery, I had hoped that I would never have to hear those string of words again. But last night I did.

Mom has been battling Colo rectal cancer (and how asinine is it to still be referring to the type of disease by it's location! shouldn't we have it by strain or something?) since the end of last year. Early March we thought she had it beat after her surgery, but apparently we were wrong. Mom has been having some pain and has been doing well with being in contact with her doctors, to pushing for tests and solutions.

Last Monday we found out that the latest scan showed that mom had a tumor in her liver. Yesterday we found out that (after her team of doctors had look at it), that it was not one tumor, but 5.

The diagnosis is not good. The doctors have given mom a few months if left untreated, but because she will be pursuing treatment, the time is more around 24 months, 2 years.

This all seems very abstract.

To think there is a high probability I may lose my mother before I am 30...that I can't seem to wrap my head around. It just seems so unbelievable.

To anyone who knows my mother, they know she is a vital person. Just full of life, spunk, and fighting spirit. She is a staple in any one's life, and has such wisdom that we all find ourselves asking for her answers.

Mom will be pursuing alternative treatment as well. Especially after many articles have spoke of the University of Alberta and their success with "DCA" . This has given me a sort of mission, steps to take and things to do. It gives me the perfect excuse to not pay attention to the giant elephant in the room.

I usually avoid sticking my head in the sand, I prefer to see the negative coming, prepare defenses, etc. But in this case I am digging a nice deep hole for my head to go in. I don't want to think of the inevitable, but would like to concentrate on life now.

I am also being rather sickeningly positive. I find my relatives speaking of death, and all I want to talk about is the opportunity this gives. How many people have the opportunity to live, literally, every day as if it were their last. To have that push to say things you would not otherwise had the courage to say, to live so that, at the end of the day, you have no regrets?

I have asked mom what her bucket list is and she has only 2 items. One is to see me pregnant and the other, well that one is personal to my sister. That's so mom. To give us a list, of what should be her most selfish thoughts and desires, instead the only 2 things are things that she knows my sister and I both want, so desperately. Many of you well know Andrew and I have struggled with getting pregnant, and finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

So though mom has a bucket list that is unselfish, I have one for her, that is not. I want mom to enjoy the time she has here. Quality over Quantity, if quantity is not to be had. I want mom to travel as she couldn't before, to swim in a cenote with me, to be spoiled and pampered. I want her to enjoy every drop of every day she has. Most of all I don't want her to worry, about money, bills, me, anything. To attain this the family has began numerous fundraising operations. The most popular, currently, is Bread for Betty with proceeds going to mom's bills. The complete proceeds of all my paintings goes directly to mom. As well, in the planning stages, is a benefit concert and market, there's even a top secret project. :)

I leave you with a picture of mom and me from last year February.