#Wheatfree

2 weeks ago my boss bought me a book, Wheat Belly by William Davis, MD.

My boss has been following a gluton free lifestyle since her daughter was young, so well over 20 years. Over the past 2 years I have worked for her, she's told me more and more why and what caused the change (I think her daughter is a Cyliac).

Well after reading the book, (which pretty much makes it's point in the introduction) I decided to try this wheat free thing out.

I started the day Andrew left for training, so that would be Sunday, July 15, 2012. It has been 9 days now. I am down 4 lbs and (at last check on the weekend) 3 inches.

But that's not the greatest part, well it is, sort of. The greatest part is that I got past my plateau, I passed the banner that was my short term goal.

I am officially (as of this morning) 198 lbs! Now for most people that's not something to be boastful about, but my short term goal was to get under 200 lbs, from then under 190 lbs, then 180 lbs, and so on until I was hovering back around 130-140 (what I view as a healthy and attractive weight for me).

Now, even before I started my wheat free diet I was on a wheat free mission. I knew so many people who could use this (just like when I read Napoleon Hill's Interview with the Devil [is it reading if it's an audio book?]). One of my lucky moments was finding out I had a friend who already went Gluten free, and that's fellow blogger, Hello Little Deer. She's been giving me tips and tricks to help me along my way, plus a good dose of support! But I, because of my pre-diabetic nature and high insulin levels wanted to go totally wheat free.

I won't lie, in the beginning it was hard, I did have wheat on the brain, much like when I quit smoking nearly 2 years ago and couldn't think of anything but that seductive smoke. I fought against it, like I did with smoking (and won, by the way, with smoking at least), and only had meat, veggies, and dairy. Most of my meals consisting of a large salad and chicken breast. That gets tired real quick, in case you were wondering. The same meal (ok different salad dressing, big whoop!) day in day out. I was finding it hard to avoid the pasta, and bread, and oh the pizza and stuff crazy bread I loved so much. So I gave in and half of one of those mini ice cream sundays with cookies in it (cookies that have wheat). I immediately felt like crap, couldn't even finish the tiny cup of ice cream, and discovered what it means to be ignorant of the poison you were taking. I had, at that point, only been wheat free for half a week, and already my body was being affected by the reintroduction of wheat in such a way!

Since the weekend has passed and my aunt brought over some rice pasta, which though the consistency is a bit weird at first, is remarkably similar (and I checked the ingredients, wheat free and gluten free). I have found it alot easier to cope. One because I then took a better look around my local grocery store and found more gluten and wheat free alternatives. Because I am going wheat free as well as gluten free, i have a little bit less options. I am still avoiding any bread substitute because I don't want to tease myself, or rather feed the urge for bread, much like how I couldn't have a "fake" smoke while quitting smoking. Finding (not just being told) Wheat Free and Gluten free alternatives to my favorite foods (like perogies!!!!) was a godsend. It has made this whole change 10 times easier.

Now I will point out that it doesn't necessarily change my "boring" meal plan, these substitutes. My reason for that is simple, these substitutes are still (or can be) high in carbs, which is what I need to keep low for my PCOS and insulin levels. So once in a while they are good for curbing a craving, or a little "reward" for my good eating habits, hell even as a consolation "junk" meal for my husband when he's sick of salad and chicken... but it's not what every day meals should be made of, not if I want to keep up this true health kick.

So now that I'm well on my way to having a wheat free lifestyle, it's time to think about what I need to add to my life. I have talked, on and on, about adding exercise. yes I know I need to do it, and yeah, i always end up not doing it... so my solution, to do both. to add and not add. I've got a nifty little kettle weight I'm going to stick on my coffee table. If I'm watching TV, well every commercial I'll do some sets as I'm sitting or standing, watching the ads go past. Or if I'm playing video games, well the intermissions become my work out time. It's not exactly a vigorous work out, but I'm still doing more then I was before, and I can (theoretically) relax and work out at nearly the same time. Of course this doesn't work if I start watching only movies, or suddenly have to pee every commercial break - but I'll try and keep myself honest.

Upheaval

Upon demands from one of my favorite bloggers, ex-roommate, DIY-er extraordinaire and general awesome person over at Hello Little Deer an update is very well warranted!

I've found myself struggling a bit with this new diet. The shakes are fine, and work quite well with my morning and afternoon routines..but the exercise, OH the exercise! The only free time I have is either when I am sleeping or after work - neither of those times do I feel very up for it.

I've committed myself to some pre-arranged dates for "fun" exercise. What I mean by fun is, of course, actual fun. Yep - laser tag, sampler fitness days run by my local community centre, fitness classes that are either dancing, or drumming, or something else in there to make it fun. But those are all in the future... I need something NOW!

I've complained before, and will again, about how much lack of enthusiasm I have for working out. I don't actually mind sitting on a treadmill, after I warm up I get into a bit of a competition with myself. I hate running outside, I originally thought, when walking the dog, that I could do that fine...but honestly he messed up my pace. heh.

I also have to admit that my life is in some upheaval. With mom's diagnosis of cancer, the subsequent treatments, and tests it's been a bit hard to get our schedules under control. I'm not blaming mom, she's now waiting for her surgery and detoxing from the radiation and chemo, so is back home and making dinners and home life is returning to normal. I've just found it hard to deal, whether coming to terms with her diagnosis, my inability to solve or help her, and more my inability to care for her - financial, emotionally, mentally... in the beginning I felt I could do it, but as others have stepped up I have felt my own inadequacies. 

The one thing I have noticed, now that normalcy is coming back, is how out of control my life gets when we're in upheaval. Not just what's in upheaval is out of control. ALL OF IT! Bills, food, exercise, hell even my moods, hobbies, etc. I haven't painted since January when mom started her treatment. It's not that I haven't felt the need, I have sketched and have been playing with a few sexy images to put down on chalk and charcoal....but it was as if i was too scared to actually do anything, as if living a normal life while mom was going through this was sacrilege.

So I've sat here planning, talking the talk, but not walking the walk.

It's easy to say money is the problem, can't afford the gym pass we want, can't afford this and that-  but that's bullshit! Honestly! We have some (somewhat ancient) exercise machines in the garage! If we could just get our asses in gear to clear out the space we need to use it, it would be perfect. And that would be another exercise too, cleaning out the garage!

Since I'm on the subject of upheaval in our lives the next one is me. I have been up heaving it. I would never consider myself to have itchy feet, or whatever it's called when you want to move all the time...but I find lately I've had that. Maybe it's an urge to escape the above mentioned upheaval in my life, maybe. I think it's more that I have found myself taking stock of where and what we are doing. I am 24, my husband is 23...I expected us, at this age, to be farther along. I expected Andrew and I to have  better careers, for me to be expecting our first child, to be owning our own home - something in there... and yet that's not reality.

We have talked and set in motion what we can, but there are things - like owning our own home, that just seem so impossible from where we are. I know it is, I have friends who do, and at younger ages then I...but for us, and our debts, it seems a pipe dream. The only solace I have is in the belief that jobs or work up north will somehow solve this problem. There were higher wages that are geared towards the high living cost, unlike here in the lower mainland where even earning nearly 30k you can't afford to live alone with any comfort. "Up North" has become a dream for me as well  - the answer to all that I view is incomplete in our life right now. But i think both Andrew and I are a bit scared - what if this dream is just that, and reality doesn't clear away these itchy feet, solve our problems, etc. I am lucky as I have an amazing husband who has and does entertain these ideas and even starts the motion towards them.

So now, as I mentioned before, with normalcy coming back down to us, I'm taking stock once more. I'm trying, very hard, to see the silver lining, or the light at the end of the tunnel here.

And I have to say, as the normalcy is coming back I've felt myself sinking back into my own skin. I am able to view the problems as today and try and find their solution, not just dream of a solution far away. I'm getting back to me.

And just in case you were wondering - though I'm not eating as healthy nor exercising as much as I would like the diet is still going well. last week I spent most of my time snacking on chips. Horrible! And I ended up gaining back the 3 lbs I lost the week before. BUT, I also lost 3.5 inches again. I'd rather see both numbers go down, but I can be happy this way. So this week changes it all. Hopefully I can talk in some laser tag with friends and family, I know next week is a big laser tag game with some girls I've met online in the area who are doing the same diet as me! I just need to fill up the rest of the 5 days with exercise and continue every week on that, and I should be good!

I leave you with the newest addition to my bedroom mirror - the saying that's been stuck in my head every time I just want to sit and watch TV at the end of my work day.

Do you have anything that gets you going when you feel you just can't do it? What are your tricks?

#2012Diet and Shaking it up

It's been a while since I last wrote about my diet and how it's going. Well I've made some bigger changes.

I'm going to start out by saying that I'm not trying to sell anybody on anything, I'm not stating to be an exercise, and what I'm doing is not for everyone... however, I am doing it. I have my reasons, and mine alone.

So after seeing some friends of mine have pretty big transformations in the course of a month on shakes called Body By Vi, I decided to give it a try.

I've previously (in high school) tried those meal supplement shakes that are always in the weight loss section of your grocery store. They never worked, of course I could never stand the taste of them either.

Well I'm giving it a better go this time around, with these shakes. I started on Wednesday the 15th. Today, at my one week check point I am down 3 lbs and 3.5 inches between my bust, waist and hips.

There are tons of recipes for the shakes, to make them taste better - and some of them (with tons of cream cheese) end up looking like more calories then a regular meal would be. I'm avoiding them and sticking with a variety of frozen fruit and milk.

I have a shake for breakfast and a shake for lunch. It ends up working well for me as those are my two most rushed meals. Considering my breakfast was usually McDonalds on the go, it's a much better alternative! My lunch was usually either fast food or oatmeal - on the fast food days its a big difference, not so much on the oatmeal days.

Typically my breakfast shake is frozen strawberries, 1% milk, and the powder. It's quite good. I have some frozen blueberries from my aunt that I'll be trying in there soon too! Lunch I make in the morning, and it's 1/2 Almond Milk 1/2 1% Milk then the powder and one scoop of hot chocolate mix (yeah I know, not super healthy...but it tastes good!).

Now i just need to encourage myself to have more exercise in my lifestyle. We got a dance game for the Kinect, and it's certainly a work out. When I get into it I can play for an hour and not realize the time is gone. However, it is really hard to get into it when my husband, mom, or roommate is watching. I refuse to do it, actually. when their around. So I don't get much exercise. My husband will usually whole up in the office and be good, mom's been gone, but the roommate seeing me dance and jiggle just creeps me right out.

So I'm going to try and do less obvious work outs. That means cleaning the garage (which is over stuffed and badly in need of organization) so I can get to our hidden exercise equipment, or make room for the elliptical trainer mom has at her husband's house.  I plan on doing a lot of things, though I know it's hard when the TV beckons at night.

Oh well it's all in the trying.

Another thing I have noticed after this change is that i have more energy in the morning. It still takes me a while to wake up, but I'm finding it a lot easier to wake up earlier. I'm also finding that once I'm awake I have the energy to do more.

No seriously, I'm doing dishes, taking the garbage out. It's like a miracle shake for mothers everywhere! Ha!

Well that's it for now. Hopefully next week has more numbers. I'm doing the 90 day challenge, so you'll be able to see me either transform myself, or fail. We will see.

Diet Dilemas

It's been a week since my last blog post about the #2012diet. It's going as well as any diet can be expected - I'm doing it, I'm not enjoying it....and there's no difference.

I know I can't expect a lot - I mean I'm not really exercising.

But I had a conversation with my husband last night that in a round about way talked about all the issues I'm having with my weight, how it effects not just how I see myself and how I feel, but what and who I am.

I feel like an A-Sexual person when I'm this weight. Aside from just feeling ugly and unattractive, the sheer exhaustion (of crating around my giant body?) has me way too tired to do anything.

Well that's how I feel. That's not what it is.

I know damn well that if I was to go exercise today, tomorrow morning I would have more energy so that I could do it again tomorrow, and so on and so forth.

But finding that magic key to get me up and at 'em that first time is almost impossible. Not because I can't find it, but because I'm battling myself.

I've talked to Andrew and we're going to try some of the community classes - I think first up is Taiko drumming. It's mixed up with some fitness, but it sounds damn cool. Their not that expensive for the classes, and it gives us a) something to do to get us fit, b) something to do together that is fun c) gets us out meeting new people. All things we need to do. High five for planning this! Now to do!

What do you do to get your butt off the couch and into the world?

#2012Diet

From my previous post about new years resolutions, you may have guessed that I want and need to lose weight. I have many excuses for my weight gain, why I eat junk, etc.

I have perfected the sarcastic "no, I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat." Which ties in another part of my weight loss needs. I have read that your fertility goes down the more obese you are. at a BMI of 30 it starts going down, at BMI 35 your fertility decreases 43 %. My BMI is 34.9. Yeah, if we want to start a family I'm going to have to tone down. Aside from that is once I reached the 200 lb limit I felt my body change. No not just get bigger, but hormonally. Suddenly I'm too tired, my periods aren't regular, I'm moody as hell - and none of this is because I'm pregnant, but because I'm fat. I've been battling the hormones for the past year, and I've  had enough- there's only so much the doctor's can do, when my size simply resets everything they try!

I have disliked my body for two years. I try not to vocalize it. Why don't I vocalize it? Well because then people call call me on it.

Last year around this time I started exercising and eating well when Andrew went to Alberta to find work. It's a lot easier to be healthy when you're on your own. You have more time, you don't have to worry about another's nutrition needs. When Andrew came back, that stopped for me

I'm hoping to kick start it again, but this time with Andrew home. This is already working out to be a challenge. One main reason is scheduling. I come home from work around 5 pm. That leaves plenty of time for dinner and work out, however I need to work out before dinner (otherwise there's no way I'm going to the gym). However, mom is home and though lately she hasn't been feeling up for dinner, but rather snacks - Andrew still needs dinner after the long hard days he puts in. So I feel almost stuck. And yes, I know he is perfectly capable of making his own dinner - but I enjoy having dinner with him, or at least the ideology of eating dinner as a family.

So far my plan for eating has been pretty simple. Stay as close to 1200 calories as possible. I keep track of this with an App on my phone. So far this week I have stayed pretty close in there.

Another key part is making sure I'm not eating out during my work day. I consider my work day to start when I leave the house, so that means no breakfast at McDonalds (which has prev been my downfall) and no running to Tim Hortons on the bank run for lunch. I'm getting up earlier and making breakfast, and bringing lunches to work - even simple ones like Oatmeal. It's considered a breakfast food, but it's enough for me.

The hardest part, aside from skipping my egg mcmuffins, is not snacking at night. I didn't realize how easily I got into the habit of just snacking on crap all evening long, during the holidays. Well I did, and that's hard to break. Easier when I'm eating dinner later.

So to conclude, what I am doing to help my weight loss right now is: Eating breakfast at home, bringing lunch to work - low cal, no snacking after dinner on crap food.

What do I need to do: Start exercising (after work before evening) which will push dinner later and hopefully solve the snacking problem. Continue logging calorie intake and (hopefully) watch the lbs shed!

Have any tips and tricks for your weight loss? What has helped you curve snacking?

Back in the Saddle

I'm back in the groove baby! No, not with writing, that has been blocked for a while now (though sci-fi ideas have been streaming in my head - a genre i would not normally find any interest in) and painting has died down as I have no current project running. No, I mean I am back in the groove of exercising! Yeah baby!

I have found out some interesting facts about how I work out... er what I burn when I am working out. The most amazing one is that 1 hour of casual racquetball (which is about what we usually play for every 2nd day) burns 636 calories. Like holy eff!

So let's take yesterday as an example. I ate 1158 calories (give or take a few)  I burnt 160 calories on treadmill and cycle. So I thought my total calorie number for the day was 998 cal. But I couldn't figure out what Racquetball would equal. Looked it up this morning and it turns out that my total calories for the day would be 362!

Um... ok that's only one meal. Basically. I had three well balanced meals yesterday (and a snack after working out as I figured I burned a sandwich's worth.

Is that right that i minus what I burned from what i ate? That seems logical.

Now. I do know I am not eating enough (though I am all for the fast weight loss, but I don't want my body to go into starvation mode!) I have read in a couple places that you should not go under 1,200 cal intake without medical supervision.
Also after doing a BMR calculation (which I found at Ask.com) I figured that to maintain my weight (chya like I want to do that) I should have an intake of 2208.83 calories. And to loose one pound one week I should be in taking 1708.83 calories. And I know it is unhealthy but I am aiming at the 1200 cal mark because well its 2 months and 2 weeks till the wedding, and I want to not have so many chins!

I am also taking vitamins. I figured my bout of being sick for nearly a month is because I drastically changed  my diet and didn't add any vitamins that I was now missing. I found a multivitamin for people losing weight. so went with that one (no name brand type deal so it was cheaper)

I know this is one boring blog entry, but I had to share it and share my excitement at getting back on the exercise train!